Wilford Brimley

Remember this guy? He's the diabetes testing supply guy. He is the one that says diabetes funny on the commercial. He makes me laugh every time he tries to pronounce it.

Anyways, here's the story behind why Wilford Brimley is on my blog:

The last few days have been irritating. My fingers hurt, I am hungry and I am tired.

Here's why:

Last week I went to my second OB appointment. There were some concerns that the baby was measuring big and that my sugar levels were too high. Oh joy.

Well, we had an ultrasound to measure the baby and lo and behold! He is measuring about 2 weeks bigger than he should. And his arms are measuring about 4 weeks bigger. My child has monkey arms. That explains the intense poking and prodding I feel all day and night. His head is also measuring about 2 weeks bigger as well.

I blame Jeff. He has a big head. So big in fact, that most hats do not fit him. It really is quite a problem. He also has long arms. Long monkey arms. I blame Jeff.

The good news is that it sounds like Jeff gets his turn to have one of our children look like him. Brendan looked like the mailman. Seriously, look at pictures, the only thing they had in common was their blue eyes and the fact that they were both boys. The rest was all me.

Anyways, moving on.

So, they were concerned about the size of the baby, and my sugars, so after the confirmation that I am carrying a 12 pounder (not really, but 5 pounds is still big) they sent me up to high risk OB.

This is nothing new to me. I am used to being high risk. Jeff and I just say that I am high maintenance. It is true. My mother was right. Poor Jeff. He had no idea what he was in store for when he married me. 

When I got upstairs to high maintenance OB, they wanted to check my levels because I had just eaten lunch (chinese food- looking back, not a good choice). My levels were high. So they gave me a blood glucose monitor, you now, the one that pricks your finger and it isn't supposed to hurt, but it does, but you don't want to admit that it hurts, especially in an OB office because once you say something hurts, every nurse, doctor, patient, whatever, tells you that this pain is nothing compared to child birth.

I know this. I have had a child. Childbirth is not something I would choose to go through everyday. But the reward is great. Pricking my finger to check sugar levels knowing that I am going to have to do it 4 times in one day is not rewarding. Not even a little. It hurts and I am going to complain about it.

So they showed me how to correctly inflict pain on myself, and told me to eat every 3 hours and to make sure that I don't skip meals or snacks and to make sure that I am not eating too much sugar, but to make sure that I am getting enough sugar........ Okay are you tired yet? Me too.

Essentially I have to watch my carb intake. I thought this was going to be really hard, and at times it can be, but I have learned that I usually don't eat enough carbs in one meal, and this is not a good thing when you are a diabetic. I also learned that I wait too long to eat between meals and snacks. Go figure, all I ever talk about is food, and it turns out I am not eating  enough throughout the day. 

There was one problem, though. I got home on the first day and realized that while the nurse gave me good advice about how many carbs to eat in one day, and how often to eat, she didn't tell me anything about all the other food groups. What if I wanted a burger, or chicken, or anything else that didn't fall in the "Carb" category? 

I was starting to panic, so I called the nurse the next day. This was the conversation. You ready?

Me: I was wondering what I have to watch other than my carb intake. The dietitian focused only on carbs and didn't address any other food group. What do I do?

Nurse: Don't worry about anything other than carbs, this is not a heart healthy diet, we are just trying to monitor your sugars. If you are hungry, eat. Eat as much protein as you want, have the burger with mayonnaise and bacon, just make sure that you count the bun.

Did you catch that? This is not a heart healthy diet. Someone in the medical profession just said those words to me.

I think she may be married to a cardologist on the 4th floor. I am looking into it. I heard her talking to a coworker about putting in a pool next summer. Perhaps my triple bypass will pay for this pool.

Anyways, I am feeling better about all this blood sugar stuff. The baby is measuring big, but he is healthy.

The risks of diabetes are a harder time delivering naturally, and a higher risk of c-section. These are the common ones. There are other risks that are much scarier, but those only occur if the mother goes untreated. I am treated, and the doctor says that with the monitoring of my sugars and watching my carbs, there is no reason to worry.

Well, I am off. I think that I am going to ask Jeff to escort me to Hardee's, where I plan to order a heart healthy sausage biscuit.