Thursday, May 26, 2011

Things I love

1. Bohemian Rhapsody. Queen. Wayne's World. Amazing. Makes me smile every time I hear it or see it.

2. My morning nap with Dylan. A.) because I get to snuggle with him, B.) because it happens like clock work every day and C.) because I am usually so exhausted from the night before that I run towards the bed so fast, it is as if I am being chased by a puma. A very large puma. What was I talking about? Oh yeah, nap time. I think I need one right now. I am making less sense than usual....

3. Baking. Brownies, cookies, cakes, cupcakes, anything with chocolate. 

4. Eating the stuff I bake. I usually try to bake for an occasion so I don't end up eating all the yumminess myself.

5. Writing. I hope to write a book one day. Yeah, you know with all the free time I have. 

6. In N Out Burger. I am actually considering driving the 48 hours to get one cheese burger. Well, let's be honest, if I drove that far I am pretty sure that I would get more than one burger.....

7. Double Stuf Oreos. Best. Thing. Ever. Why would you get regular oreos when you could have double the white, fattening creme in the middle. It baffles the mind.

8. Being a mommy. I love it. Best job ever. However thankless and exhausting it may be, it still beats a nine to five.

9. The Dave Matthews Band. I know that they are, like, so 90's, but still they are still awesome. Don't deny it. You know that you have caught yourself singing along to Crash in your car.

10. Friends. Well, you guys are awesome, too, but I mean the tv show. I love it. I have watched the entire season so many times that I can't count. I could recite the entire series to you if you asked. I dare you, ask me.....

11. Cooking. I love being in the kitchen and making yummy foods. I also love eating it. Did I mention that I love eating? I did? Oh sorry....

12. Scrabble. I love it when I get a great word and I make Jeff sweat. (On another post I need to write about the things I hate: Losing. I always lose to Jeff in Scrabble. To date, we have played a few dozen games, and to date I have won exactly zero.) Stupid Scrabble....

13. New York City. In another life I would live there with my 2.5 kids, my penthouse apartment, my designer clothes, and my super rich husband. I would throw elaborate parties where it looked like I did all the work, but really I would spend all day at the spa while my staff of chefs, maids, nannies, and drivers did all the work. Ahhhh, what a life....

14. High heels. This may surprise you. Because those of you that have seen me in the past 15 years have probably seen me in converse, flip flops, or tennis shoes. Even to church I wore one of those three types of shoes. But this still doesn't change the fact that I love high heels. I just can't wear them because I am a klutz (see this post for further proof of my klutziness). If I had my choice, I would wear them all the time with my designer clothes and fancy handbags. This is however not my lot in life. I am destined to wear jeans, flip flops, and tank tops. Because, let's be honest, I would be ticked off if Dylan threw up on my $800 pair of Jimmy Choo's. It is much easier to hose of a pair of rainbows.....

Those are just a few things that I love. Stay tuned for more. Because, depending on my mood, the things I love change daily. Oh I just thought of one more thing I love: My husband for putting up with my mind changing and mood swings. :)

Oh, want to see one more thing that I love?

This face. :)

Monday, May 16, 2011

Count your blessings

1. There are times that I get ticked that Jeff has to stay late at work and miss dinner.
- Then I realize that there are wives out there who's husbands are working overseas and they will miss dinner for months to come.

2. There are times that I get frustrated that Dylan won't sleep through the night.
-Then I realize that there are moms out there who have lost their children (I am one) and who would do anything to be up all night with a healthy, happy baby.

3. There are times that I wish I was skinnier.
-Then I realize that there are people in this world, this nation, this city who will go to bed hungry tonight. And it makes me feel like I am lucky to have food, so much in fact that at times, I eat too much of it.

4. There are times that I wish I had more stuff, cooler phone, nicer clothes, more money etc.
-Then I realize that I am very fortunate to have a home, clothes, and a cell phone. I am in the middle class and I have little to worry about when it comes to money. There are people who worry about how they are going to feed their children every day.

5. There are times that I wish I could sleep in and just have a few minutes to myself.
-Then I realize that there are people out there who are all alone and have no one to care for, or to care for them. They would do anything to have family around to care for.

6. There are times that I miss my friends, and family in California and I get sad.
-Then I realize that I am blessed to have a phone, a computer, and a webcam. I can talk to my friends and family when I want (if they want to talk to me of course). I realize that my wonderful mother who lives 2000 miles away, is only a phone call away.

I have had a lot of crap happen in my life. But losing my son, moving across the country, and having to start my life over has taught me to appreciate the small things in life.

I get up in the middle of the night and (most of the time) smile because Dylan's only problem is that he wants to be held, fed and snuggled. He is healthy and I get to hold him whenever I want. 

Losing my first son has taught me to appreciate the mundane motherly tasks that most take for granted. 

The Lord has given me trials and I am thankful that he has used those to teach me and show others his love.

I have said it before, but it bears repeating. I never knew that I was strong enough to go through all these trails, but I am flattered that God thinks so.

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13

Here are three of my blessings:

Sunday, May 8, 2011

My Mother's Day

Mother's Day. Something that in the past I have only been a spectator in.

Today, however, I got to be a player.

I woke up twice with Dylan last night (which was a relief after getting up at least 4 times since he has been sick). Each time I held him and nursed him and looked at his perfect little face. It has been 7 and a half months, and I still can't believe that he is mine.

This time last year I was mourning the death of my first born, but rejoicing about being pregnant again.

I was a nervous wreck wondering if this baby would be sick, too, or if he would be healthy and happy.

This time last year I was able to sleep through the night, with the exception of waking up every hour to pee (gotta love being pregnant!)

This time last year I was holding back tears all day. All I wanted to do was hold my baby in my arms.

Today, I was holding back tears as well, but this time it was because I stood in front of friends and family and dedicated my son.

This time last year all I wanted was to have this new little person in my arms to hold.

Today I got my wish.

My little man is healthy, and happy. He is perfect and he is a blessing.

Today, Pastor Scott said that God gives and he takes away. I am so thankful that God chose to give me two wonderful boys. Even if he did take one away, he also gave me one as well. And that is the most amazing mother's day gift ever.